a boring old hag who loves to scream her head off, mutter in gibberish, and talk to random people on the streets.
140786
Beautiful music. Gorgeous food. the Sun.Sea.Sand. Butterflies. Dance. Movies.
Spontaneity. Laughter. Love. Courage.
The Weird, Beautiful, and Unique.
the entire collection at HMV
my spanish chef (: im gonna marry him!
zonk time!
more of Desigual and Koi Nobori!
the yakpak hobo bag!
A Lifetime of Musicmaking with Inspiring People
and to share this with the world
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
hello world. heres me, back from the hiatus.
and now i feel like having verbal diarrhea. and just writing it all out.
so its gonna sound completely jumbled out but i dont really give a damn.
a few days ago the ideabank darling excitedly told me over msn, "you know what??? i had this super weird dream yesterday!!! i dreamt that ******* proposed to you!!! and that i din even know till someone asked me, and i was so embarrassed cos you din tell me so i just pretended i already knew abt it." haha. that got me all amused and excited too. but not to worry, girl, if sth like this ever happened i would tell u.
i'll admit im a hopeless romantic at heart. im the kind who daydreams happily abt her dream wedding. hello, i even created a list of people i want to be my bridesmaids and whatevertheguysarecalled. haha. i would love having a beach wedding, just around sunset where the whole sky is ablaze with gorgeous reds, orange and golden hues. and theres gotta be live music! thats utterly important. a fantastic jazz orchestra, plus a singer with powerhouse unique vocals to sing my favourite songs and and...fatt from acidbar! haha. and plus a way cool percussion group. and i want everyone there dancing away. from the young to the young at heart. the best part is having everyone u love all there, thats awesome. and the best side part? the dress of course! pssst. its gold. and i saw it at the shop below my godmum's shop in outram. hur hur. see how crazy i can get....ive even decided on all these nonsense.
sadly, its the finding of the person to share this wonderful day, and the hundredthousandmillion days after, thats the most difficult task. and until i find him, i'll remain happily single. (: he doenst need to be perfect cos nobody is. but he does need to be someone whom i can be frank with, have fights and make up with, make important decisions tog and support each other. someone with passion for his job, his career, or his interests. someone who can inspire me to greater things. make me laugh silly too. with whom, i can grow to be a better person. so there u go, just a little of my thoughts on love. its sth worth blogging abt i tenk. cos love is a beautiful thing. any form of it. and to be able to share the moments in each others lives, to be such a big part of each others lives, thats one of the greatest gifts you could give to each other.
i was sad+pissed+frustrated+at a total loss of what to do the past few weeks. the icing on the cake was when u could possibly not even glance my way more than the grand total of say, 4 times the whole entire time that night. it hurts when ur friends have more to say to me than you do. as ideabank says, the saddest part is losing a friend that you could open up to so much. i dont want another three-year saga. thats tiring and draining. and no matter how wrong everything might have been. it shouldnt be like this. having to be reduced to this. the years of friendship, where did it fly to? its not even like we just met. gosh. and the thing i miss most? how incredibly exciting it was to experience u making music. evertyhing just flowed and u can get so hyped up and animated. and how we could sit tog without talking once, and just play together for the longest time. it was magic. and it was psychic-coolness. i miss how ur thoughts and ideas, they inspired me so much. bet you never knew.
on another note, its really mindboggling, incredibly stimulating to learn from ms.arabesque! and im so grateful to have met mr ng and his generosity. and plus mr hartung 'anything but normal, please!' and mr boris. dearest dr manhart. dr kan and dr goh. people like this. they really embody the meaning of living for music's sake. everything they do, serves the sole purpose of music. and that is truly humbling and inspiring to experience. ive learnt so much from these teachers.
chilipadi on 2:03 AM
Thursday, October 04, 2007
change can happen swiftly. catching u unaware.
it creeps up upon you. slowly. stealthily. a predator on padded paws.
and when u open up ur eyes and take a look around, the comforting world as u knew it to be,
its gone.
seemingly the same. but its not anymore.
u cant quite place a finger on it. when someone asks you to say it out its like theres nth much.
nth substantial. hard to put into words, cos it just seems awfully trivial.
but such triviality, it gnaws away at you. from the inside of you. like a horrid itchy throat u cant get rid of. and there are mornings when i open my eyes to this world and wish that simple wish we all make. at one point or another. for all that was beautiful to return.
there are many things i miss. most of all i miss the you that i glimpsed in the special mths of march to august. that person doesnt seem to exist anymore, im not even sure that person existed. was that just a mere figment of my imagination?
chilipadi on 1:20 AM
