Dandelions are little miracles...

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

happy birthday mr. alan phoenix vogue kartik! haha.
it was scary going on a sugar high yesterday. i scared myself. the pent up energy i had inside of me, like a tightly wound spring that had been compressed too long was just waiting to let itself out. i tell u, if i could i would have gotten up and run ten times around the whole of raffles city shopping center. and u know hwat, i din even take any sugar!!! lack of sleep i guess? plus one whole day of intense rehearsing. haha. so im on another level of madness now? omg.

something happened yesterday. too.
extremely weird.surprisng.scary.and yet also surprisingly,nice. haha.
it was just plain mind-stunning that it happened.

im in a list making mood recently. (: today i shall do a list of.... i know. five random things abt me. haha. pls do one of yourself and post in ur blog. andentertain me.

1. i multi task in my sleep. u see, i talk, shout, hold audible convo with characters that appear in my dreams, walk abt my house, fall down from the bed, attempt to climb up the window grilles (omg). and in the process i scare or entertain the whole household. this great talent was a gift from my mum..haha. she tried to sleep-fry a pillow when she was my age.
2. if i could i would cut my hair damn short but too bad i cant..i would look like a swollen mushroom head. too bad for having pongpong hair.
3. i have a constant craving to be sneak out of my house at midnight and go lie down in the middle of the huge bball court infront of my house. and just fall alseep there, under the stars. (: it would be v happening. like how sometimes there are a few likeminded ppl i see there, playing their guitars and just chatting into wee hours of the night.
4. i wanna go rockclimbing and mountain climbing n learn scuba diving and go kayaking man. havent done these for the longest time. i missss.
5. sometimes i communicate better thru written word rather than spoken. and that sux bigtime. i know i either don make much sense or lose track of my self, or im too shy to say whatever i wanna say. sometimes, im just in front of the person and i take so long to decide how to say it, or if i should say it. and i never ever reach the conclusion. hur hur. hopeless like mad.

ok la. im going to sleep. i miss my friends! smint.fang.ali.alibaba.tim.xinhe.ideab*nk.angela.grannyfia.mouse.thebears.cand.cookymosnter.
ure all much missed okay. and i wanna see u ALL.

goodnights (:

chilipadi on 11:49 PM
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Tuesday, February 27, 2007

since theres some anon. tagger called yq's stomach. i shall blog abt my ten fave food. yes. again. haha. excuse me for the inoriginality cos my mind and body are floating now after a mere two hours of sleep yest. its madness.

so here goes.
the ten things i wanna eat right now.
1. fig and olive sandwiches, hot or cold. anything goes (: i love them! so chunky and packed with goodies, fresh from the earth. haha.
2. swensens ice cream. omg. choc malt balls rock i tell u. and i wanna try the breakfast there.
3. talking abt bfast, yes, i wanna go for subway bfast and tcc bfast and menottis bfast hahaha. im on a bfast craze!
4. maggiemeegoreng. (: altho abdullah is violently against this, i still tenk its good stuff.
5. thai curry. my newlove. esp the one cooked by mum.
6. oh oh oh chweeeeekueehhhhh
7. oh oh oh oh oh humongous fishballsfishcakesandotahslices at chinatown. twinny ure wanted!
8. dim sum. hoho. my fave uncle
9. lets see. yes i have cravings for soup too.
10. and. lastly. the crazies thing in the world once more, donut factory. pignix, when when when? we need to have another productive day again hahaha. that was fun.

i don care if you tenk im plain greedy. as the big one rationalizes for me, hungry people are good. why? cos they are the ones who make the world happier! if you eat with them, you feel happier when u see them grow happier after filling their empty or not so empty stomachs. (: so u see, i have such an impt role in this world. i make u guys happier! haha (:

chilipadi on 5:53 PM
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Saturday, February 24, 2007

im sick of this. helping people is meant to be something that is joyful. but you make it a living hell for me. have u ever thought of a fact that i have a life of my own too? and in retrospect, have i ever thought of living more for myself? its partly brought abt by myself i guess. i never know how to say no. i always felt that was selfish. and its sad that im tenking this way now. but now. i want out. i want to be able to sleep at a time before 1am. i wanna do things because i want to. can someone teach me how to say no? why do you have some idea that i am here to be at ur beck and call? im not. if u are stressed, so am i. why dont u open ur eyes and look around u. everyone is just as busy and suffering and stressed and ure not the only one and that is enough reason that u don have any license to throw ur temper around when u want, raise ur voice if u feel like it. the world is full of selfish people. and it irks me so. ive been scaring my mum recently. bysobbinmyselftosleep. and its scaring me. sobbing like the end of the world has arrived when it hasnt isnt good. but im near to the point of breaking down. im losing it i tenk. and im finding it increasingly harder to control my emotions. any moment in time, any carelessly spoken word or look or gesture is enough to turn the leaking tap on. but im glad to have a mum like you, dearest mum. ure happeningly cool, tho sometimes u irritate me like mad (its retribution for me right). and thankyou for loving me so much. in so many ways. and being so psychic abt me. the way you just know things even my deepest secrets even tho i don tell you, its scarrry. but yes, thankyou for being here for me always.

ive been having tons of interesting and engaging conversations with phoenix recently. hehe. thanks dude. more pls. (: i enjoyed myself man. even tho we almost ended up having a war! haha.

i watched The Woodsman today. found it at home, i nv watched it tho i bot the dvd damn long ago. and its really good. its haunting. the way the issue of a lost soul trying to regain his place in society is dealt with amazingly. u see that normalcy is redefined for him. u see the many layers to a person and how society often fails to see that. how we always stereotype.
"the world tends to notice the bird with the brightest plumage. but that doesnt mean those with feathers that are not as bright, are uglier." sth liddat. heh. i tenk thats so true.

chilipadi on 10:00 PM
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Friday, February 23, 2007

hello darlings (: i know i havent blogged in a million years. for some weird reason i cant view my own page from my house com so that pisses me off greatly.

celebrated this old man's birthday today. it was amusing to see his reaction when the quintet played happy birthday for him after the opening bar of schubert's trout quintet. and even more so to be able to slap him on his shoulders 31 times (: haha. so we all had a good time at menotti's. im gonna nominate that waiter for best service award man. hes the best. always makes our visit there great.

its also happy birthday to my dearest blurrest and most hilarious lignum bodyguard alene!! awhile ago tho. im glad to have had the chance to know this girl better recently. she never fails to make me laugh. and the most impt thing is she doesnt ever set out to amuse. its all in earnest. (: also mouse huimin. hehe....girl i'll see u soon in march okay? MUACKS.

ive been planning all sorts of nonsense, complete with the addition of 'after march'. hur hur as if i'll really get so much time aft march for them. but!! its exciting! so much i wanna do after march! (: iwannagohongkongandhavepicnicsandusemyfonduesetandkboxandwatchmoviesandbakeandrepaymysleepdebtsandspend
timewithsomanypeopleandiwannagofortheexcitingeasterneuropetripomgandiwannalearnmychinesemedthingieandetcetcetc.

yes. theres the triple E coming. exciting eastern europe trip! coolness i tell u. im praying with all twenty fingers and toes triple crossed everyday! i wanna be part of it!!

and The Big One is finally back in sg! for one year! woots. ure much welcomed back. (: its been fun! more happening stuff yes? haha. and u finally see me at the piano. embarrassing la. full of nonsense.

im having so much fun playing schuberts quintet. and chen yi's ancient dances from china. and ligetis etudes. and yadayada. its just this happy feeling, being able to play such great music. its totally happening. i cant wait for poulenc! hohohos.

alrighty thats all for now. im tired. more next time. happy cny everyone! hope you had a great week, great rest, and had fun visiting and pigging out? haha. ciaos. (:

chilipadi on 1:11 AM
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Thursday, February 01, 2007

its the final lap of school for us and theres so much stuff to do. work to finish. pieces to practice. yada yada. and yet somehow it sometimes feels like all the work we need to finish, they arent urgent cos the deadlines were not looming in sight yet. (oh well now they are emerging slowly one by one). so everyone just KIVed them and didn really wanna tenk abt it. but its coming closer and closer. and its scaring the hell outta me. just one mth more and thats it, bye bye diploma studying. so i shouldn slack so much right? i should be chionging more now. but im not. pull up those non existent socks of yours yunqi and start doing some real work instead of procrastinating like mad! yea man. im doing it so unconsciously that its become too natural.

too much stuff flew by and i ve lost the urge to blog abt them anymore. its been madness. shiokness. lotsa fun. frustrations. pigging out. angry stuff. sad stuff. sleep deprivation. practicing and rehearsal chionging. for the past one mth since school started. its hard to believe its only been one mth!

blah blah. my minds too tired to tenk much abt anything now. and. theres the thought of where to study in the future thats been bugging me constantly. well at least ive got some kinda sketchy plan now. but i gotta do some real action for that. and i need buckeroos. sometimes, i wish there was somebody who could gimme some concrete advice.

sometimes i just feel lost.
and sometimes, i wish there was a living thing with ears that are labelled 'for yunqi's use only' so i could pour all my rantings and whinings and complains and worries into it. and that person would just listen to me and lemme go on n on.. and that person would somehow make it feel like, its not so bad after all. that person needn say a single word. but thats just...wishful thinking i guess. thats sth hard to find, at least for me.

sorry if this has been depressing to read eh. to complete the whole random post. i just wanna say playing bartok with quy zy and fifi was awesome. i totally enjoyed myself. and that i love sandwiches. and chamber sounds. andiwannagoswimming.

chilipadi on 6:20 PM
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