Dandelions are little miracles...

a boring old hag who loves to scream her head off, mutter in gibberish, and talk to random people on the streets. 140786

Beautiful music. Gorgeous food. the Sun.Sea.Sand. Butterflies. Dance. Movies.
Spontaneity. Laughter. Love. Courage.
The Weird, Beautiful, and Unique.

the Mini Austin!
the entire collection at HMV
my spanish chef (: im gonna marry him!
zonk time!
more of Desigual and Koi Nobori!
the yakpak hobo bag!
A Lifetime of Musicmaking with Inspiring People
and to share this with the world

Saturday, February 19, 2005

the things we experience in life force us to change. mould us into who we eventually become. change. its a word we all can never escape from. whether you fear it. embrace it. what then abt maturity? how do you perceive maturity in a person? is it how that person carries himself? his thoughts? his behaviour? how he handles situations? and what abt relationships-friends, bgr, etc? why does one chooses to be friends with another. what is it...that special factor that makes one become so close to another human being? looks? character? similar interests? opposing personalities? a spark of chemistry maybe? security? the way that you manage to forgive that person for all his faults?
in recent months, or weeks, i have started looking at myself. thinking abt me. and the ppl i know. somehow. i feel that many have changed. including myself. is tat good? for some maybe. to me. i became more independent. perhaps life in nafa made me so. i do things on my own more. and somehow tat makes me proud of msyelf. hehe. but then again. im disappointed in myself. i have become much colder....in many ways. i dun smile so much to pple i guess.. im so rude. sometimes i dun even realize i am. until someone has to tell me. and then i realize with a shock the kinda person ive become. where has that supposedly helpful and nice girl gone to? in her place is some kinda narrow minded girl. some spoilt brat. somebody who tenks she how great and so has no time to help her mum, her sis, to reply nicely to an innocent salesperson. i hate myself sometimes.

sometimes. being alone is necessary. to reflect on things. to think. and just be comfy in your own skin. and contented. it allows one to settle down, be who she or he really wants to be.
also, one tends to behave differently when he is with a different set of pple. i get what jeremy means when he says he wanna be alone. yet not. sometimes i wish i could bury my head like an ostrich. as qin said yest.. being able to be alone comes with maturity. i tenk its quite true. it gives you the space to think and ponder abt things. to figure stuff out.
its saddening when you leave behind sth. when you put in so much effort in to something and after you are gone. it just kinda falls apart. and you have no idea what to do abt it. cos frstly you aint supposed to be there anymore. secondly you would be a kpo. you have no idea wat they want you to do. or well. do they even want you there. its a helpless feeling. watching it disintegrate. and it means so much to everyone.

chilipadi on 12:49 AM